The Best Little Quark I Can Be
You ever have one of those dreams? I mean one that doesn’t seem like the rest. One that really sticks with you over the years. Seven or so years ago I had such a dream. It is difficult to share the sense of Profound Unity that I experienced without it seeming trite. But here goes.
I had an awareness of my body, that it was asleep and then it seemed that my essence was expanding and growing. It filled my room, my house, the state, the Earth and eventually the Universe itself. With this awareness I encompassed everything and was aware of all the smaller elements with myself.
Then I began to contract and shrink. When I reached my normal proportion I traveled within to the atomic and subatomic levels. It was at this point that I had the awareness of how very small I am in the scope of the Universe and I am like a Quark going about its business preforming its function, living its life and just by doing this making so many opportunities possible. I have my place. And a wondrous thing that is!
Now you might notice that I have not used the word Purpose during this discussion and that is intentional. For me this word has a lot of baggage. Often times it is coupled with words such as Faith. (I prefer Trust).
I am sure my dislike for them has something to do with the connotation that sets the center outside of the individual. They imply that ones has to be something other than what they already are to have worth and value.
And the cheesiest part is that I woke myself up saying “I want to be the best little Quark I can be!” over and over again like a mantra. When I am stressed or overwhelmed I try to take myself back to that place and it really puts everyday struggle in perspective for me.